... “Man, and I really just wanted some groceries.” She let out a long sigh and got comfortable on the linoleum floor.
... “Well, you came to the wrong place.” I snorted.
... “Tell me about it.”
... We giggled together for a second.
... “Hey, didn’t you hear? Shut up!” cried the second gunman from the front door, still trying to get the shutters to raise. I glanced at the frozen goods wall where a constant stream of muttered Russian had been rising from the babushkas since the shutters came down and decided against pointing it out to him.
... There was a pause of polite obedience as the two of us sat like naughty kids, reprimanded by the teacher.
... “So, what do you need gochujang for?” I whispered, unable to resist. She smiled.
... “Pork. There’s this Korean barbeque around the corner from my house that does the most amazing marinated pork. I’ve been trying to replicate it for months now, and I recently found a recipe using the stuff. Have you used it before?”
... I nodded. “Yea, careful, it’s.... fragrant.”
... “Powerful?”
... “Oh, yeah.”
... “Perfect. I really want the flavor delivered with a punch, you know?”
... I smiled and my pulse began to quicken again. I was falling in love.
... “What about shut up don’t you two understand?”
... We stared up innocently at the second robber, who wore a black turtleneck sweater in addition to his balaclava. I could see the whites of his eyes. He must have been sweltering. “You think this gun is a prop? It’s not. Shut the hell up!”
... I could smell his sweat. It was, I remember thinking, a convincing display, as he waved his pistol in our faces. But love's bite had had made me impervious to fear. As soon as he stalked back to the shuttered door, we resumed.
... “Do you cook with a lot of sauces?” I asked hopefully.
... “Well I cook a lot, but I can’t say I’ve really explored the condiment realm very thoroughly.”
... “So, fermented date juice isn’t on your regular shopping list then?”
... She stifled a laugh. “No, I just kind of saw this place and decided I had to get some weird stuff now that I’ve seen it, you know? A friend recommended the place after I was having trouble finding gochujang. I promise I mean to use it, though.”
... I was on the verge of asking what she planned to make with the date juice when something along the lines of an artillery blast went off very close by. Turtleneck had attempted to shoot at the steel shutter that barred the entrance. I guess I should say that he shot it successfully, as the bullet or shell or whatever did in fact hit the shutter. However, the implacable corrugated barrier remained, minus a two or three inch hole....